


Postcards

by Spiderheart



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: F/F, Sadomasochism, but like. sexy torture not torture torture, flogging kink, kink lesbians, klismaphilia mention, punishment kink, torture kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-30 02:42:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20807180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spiderheart/pseuds/Spiderheart
Summary: Comments? Questions? Bonus Features? Come over tomy discord!





	Postcards

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lycaenion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lycaenion/gifts).

  
  


Crowley and Aziraphale thought that they were the only ones with an Arrangement; this was both false and true—they were, certainly, the only ones with an Arrangement where the contents of said Arrangement weren’t sexual in nature. Everyone else—all nine of the other top tens in redemption/damnation numbers—had an _Arrangement._

Talia, Principality of Scotland, was the first to invent Lying By Implication To Your Boss. She had climbed quite high in the ranks, quite _quickly_, without anyone the wiser for it. Eventually, she was assigned to a rather wily demon, who kept Felling every angel sent to thwart her.

Erika was very good at her job—so good, in fact, that Home Office had given her no less than twenty-seven honours, over the years, especially when she Felled an angel. After about 1607, she’d been handed Scotland, told to ‘work her magic’, and had promptly run into a Principality. As always, she had used her usual methods, and gotten the angel into bed in short order.

And then the angel didn’t Fall.

Erika was incensed, but also thrilled; she’d never had an angel so _resistant_, before, and after some time in thought, she seduced the angel into not just sinful acts of sodomical nature, but included _tools_ and _leather_.

And the angel did not Fall.

The third time, Erika included pain and by all rights invented the concept of sadomasochism a couple centuries before the humans got round to it, and when the angel still didn’t Fall, finally asked her how she managed it, panting and spent and sore on her bed, the angel beside her looking just as spent but rather serene about it, because she always managed to look serene, damn her doe eyes. Damn her long dark curls. Damn her profile, which belonged on a damned coin.

‘Well, today especially I can say I thoroughly punished a Naughty Rascal of a demon, and after all, I did.’

Erika just stared at her for several minutes.

‘But that’s—that’s _lying_.’

‘No it isn’t, it’s just telling the important facts.’

‘Fuck me,’ Erika said, the revelation coming to her all at once. Talia laughed, low and delicious.

‘I thought I already had.’

After that, their relationship had blossomed, and by about 1720 had settled into a comfortable Arrangement, that included Erika’s very full, very luscious bottom being striped with the lash of angelic righteousness regularly—along with various other torments, many of which were thought up by Erika, herself, and coquettishly told to her angel, who had never really settled on a human name, and so Erika simply called her Madam, when around humans—and in the bedroom.

Round about the time the camera was invented, Erika started sending naughty postcards, artfully posed and far wickeder than should have been able to get through the post. Each one had a flirtatious little verse on the back; and each one was answered with a night of torment that somehow fit the theme.

Erika hoped the swimsuit would prove similarly inspiring—she had discovered the strange and thrilling misuses of medical equipment around 1952, after meeting a fellow colleague from the Incubus Department who _specialised_ in such fetishes. She was _eager_ to have her angel try out fucking a very different orifice, as soon as possible. After, of course, a terribly punishing application of (very diluted) holy water.

Erika waited, squirming delightedly, for the day or so it would take her angel to reply.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments? Questions? Bonus Features? Come over to [my discord](https://discord.gg/Mvygfnn)!


End file.
